Life.

Somedays I wish I could just jump up into the wind with my eyes closed and fly away to my hearts calling and open up.. and BAM there I am.
*sigh*
Patience is annoying
but with it comes reward
heart pulled to its home
beauty seen in front of my eyes
music made by voices unheard by the world
smiles shining through children regardless of all pain
life is a journey in itself
filled with mini adventures all bundled up within it
patience
reward
desires
passions
love
beauty
music
smiles
Hope.

Friends

friends that you can share hours upon hours of laughter
tears upon tears,
minutes of silent understanding,
heartbreaks,
smiles that reach the moon,
hugs that last a lifetime,
jokes that never grow old,
friends that accept you no matter what,
are friends from God,
are friends to be treasured,
are friends in my heart,
forever and ever and ever.

 

Fire

fire has fallen and set alight my heart
darkness has faded away to nothingness
the desires in me are no longer dormant
but they come alive with one thought
my dreams are filled with you
at every corner, every step, every door,
from this day on I won't turn back
the fire thats burning is pushing me forwards
forwards to you and to all I want to do
smiles are here to stay
laughs echo around
my heart is happy, joy has come
my love for the nations is stronger than ever
my hope for people brighter
trust is like a rock
faith is like a mountain
with your fire alone
we will do great things

Words

words spoken underneath covers
float around violently
never meant to be heard
are being shouted at every turn
hearts that were never meant to break
are shattering into millions of pieces
all I can see are smiles
covering up every bad thought
lies hit me like a hard cold brick wall
I can see through everything
you are trying to hide
I will give you a chance to speak the truth
think carefully
words can change everything
words can break hearts
words can cause pain beyond imagination
words are powerful
words are violent
choose your words wisely
words.

What am I doing?

What am I doing? I have absolutely no idea. I really really don't. My mind changes its mind every 5 seconds. It's a good thing my heart knows what it wants, even if I don't. I can feel it in me telling me something, something that I have yet to translate.

Dreams Dreams Dreams won't leave me alone. 

All I can think about it is dreaming dreaming dreaming.

I want to do so much, its crazy. I want to do so much and I know I have plenty of time to do it all (maybe? 2012?) but it feels like its all going nowhere. Like I am getting left behind. I don't want to miss my wind of change, or my the current pulling me towards my hearts desires. I want to go go go go now. ahhh. Patience was never my strong point.

eeeeeeeeeeeep.

I want You.

where i go no one knows
prayer by prayer flows through me
uncertain endings creeping along
unsure paths making themselves known
what i want no one knows
whispers that come under my breath
wishes that escape my lips
my hearts desires are all i see
a million things that i dream
i throw my hope up in the air
waiting for it to catch a drift
to pull me along to my destiny
faith is thrown amidst all pain
no matter how hard
i will stay secure in your name
my trust is being pulled on
but i wont let go
for you are all i want
forever and ever

Where to where to?

Where to where to? Where should I turn? I feel all confident to take a certain turn. But will whispers sneak into my ear and lead me down the other road? Should I follow my heart and God. Should I listen to these whispers and succumb to their continuing word.

All week I have felt like a little lost child looking for my mother.
Only that, I'm not looking for my mum. I'm looking for something my heart is crying out for.
I'll let you know when I find what I'm looking for. Which road I start to go down.

Thoughts.

My heart is still entangled with the thoughts and memories of you.
I look outside and try to see my world through your view.
If we see the same sky, sun, moon and stars.
Why does it feel so distance, as if on another planet?
I want to see your colours, all vivid and bright.
So unique and beautiful, like none I've ever seen.
No smell is quite the same. No sight to blow me away.
I want to be with you. Walking hand in hand.
Come sweep me away and take me to your kingdom.


I am waiting.

Tea.

So..... I like tea. Quite alot.
Today I was reading my book on the bus, and there was this guy who was talking about tea, it said: Tea was his only addiction, an answer to everything, to every headache, every thought, every confusion, every scolding:

It got me thinking. Why is tea so addictive? I mean seriously. I have lots of tea. When I'm bored, happy, sad, annoyed, before I go out, when I get back, when thirst kicks in. I could think of many more examples.
And anyways I used the wonderful use of Google and found these cool 'tea' quotes.

If you are cold, tea will warm you.  If you are too heated, it will cool you.  If you are depressed, it will cheer you.  If you are excited, it will calm you.  ~Gladstone, 1865


Tea is liquid wisdom.  ~Anonymous


Tea is a wonderful thing. Especially when with a friend. 


So my answer to my question is simple, it tastes good! It feels good, it makes you want to curl up and read a book, sit outside in the sun sipping away, it takes all the yucky sad stuff and makes you feel warm and happy inside. It gives me a clear head, able to think about everything right. Tea is the answer to everything. Seriously. 

Goodbyes.

Goodbyes were said once again.
My heart is sore once more.
The tears that come are not stopping.
Hugs that weren't suppose to end.
Smiles that should of stayed a while.
Hands that shouldn't let go.
Why do we say goodbye?

Once again the family that means so so so so so much to me, and have a extra special place in my heart left to head back to India. They say it gets easier. I can tell you right now (due to experience) that it most certainly does not.

Airports give me mixed emotions. Whether I am going or friends. I just get all mixed up in excitement, fear, sadness, nervousness, absolute happiness and confidence. But not this time. This time was just downright sadness. Borderline waterfall tears really. I could ramble all day about how I did not want them to leave, or how in a split second I would jump on a plane after them. I know that their heart is in India, you cannot go there and not have you heart completely smitten with India. I know God wants them there... what more can you say. I am happy for them beyond words and can't wait to visit them again soon :)